兒子怎麼會這樣?!

孩子初生,久不久我們就要到母嬰健康院檢查他的狀況。每次我和太太去,總是帶著一大堆問題。會不會太黃啦?身上的烏黑是怎麼回事啦?整天打嗝有沒有問題啦?

這天又帶兒子來看滿身滿房香水味的女醫生。由兒子出生後三天的黃疸問題開始,就是這位鬈曲長髮的珊珊醫生為他檢查。

醫生又用儀器照一照兒子,簡單地照射了兩次,她宣布:「BB的黃疸指數已下降,已經不用擔心了。」

可是,養兒一百歲,我還是緊張兮兮地問:「我發覺呢,兒子好像一隻眼睛大,一隻眼睛小。這會不正常嗎?」

香水醫生看看我,看看我太太,再看看我,然後說:「只要沒影響視力,BB眼睛的大小一般也沒關係。有時候BB的各類情況,也可能與遺傳基因有關。」

「那麼,他看東西時好像有點鬥雞眼,這需要矯正嗎?」我馬上再搬出準備好的第二條問題問醫生。

香水醫生看著我,瞇起雙眼地對我微笑:「其實你不用太擔心的,你要的答案,其實都可能在這裡找得到。」說罷,她遞給我一塊黑皮包裝、像文件夾似的東西,因為外套很厚,看來裡面只放著一張薄薄證書似的。黑皮表面一個字也沒有,我正納悶裡面到底是甚麼,於是打開來一看,果然,一切也一目了然!

裡面也是一個字也沒有,連一張紙都沒有,卻只有一個頭像,一個我自己的頭像,因為裡面放的原來是一面鏡。

難怪!難怪乎兒子眼睛一大一小,難怪乎兒子老是鬥雞眼,醫生多看我一眼,就知道問題的癥結所在。

太太常對這件事津津樂道,偏偏我老是不能釋懷。

太太照顧兒子的日子裡,最讓她困擾的問題之一,就是兒子總是愛哭鬧,不肯好好去睡穩一點睡久一點,讓她多少能休息一下。

我下班回家,最常問太太的問題就是「今天兒子睡得怎麼樣了」。往往這會直接影響太太的情緒。

今晚太太又跟我抱怨,說兒子怎樣都不肯去睡。吃完奶後放上床不久,又開始哭鬧了。

我忽然想到一個原因,就跟太太說:「兒子老是不愛睡,我知道為甚麼!」於是我帶太太到廁所,讓她站在鏡子前面,讓她看著自己。

「看到了嗎?」我得意地說,「這就是為甚麼!」

太太斜睨著我:「甚麼都看不出來,神經病!」

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